L I F E…in retrospect
Today is a day filled with mixed emotions – elation, happiness, admiration, longing, even a slight envy, I would say. Oh, look at all the things happening to the people around me. *Sniff*Sniff*
My good old friend Karen and Will are tying the knot in December and are happily planning their wedding day. It’s poignant, no less, because I was there to witness the start of their journey from that first step back in college ages ago. Back then, we were still teenagers embarking on life. We had no particular direction. No particular goals set. I suppose most of us were focused on scoring through university rather than thinking about much of anything else. Fast forward to today…look at us now. Look at all of us. Look at how far each of us has come in so many aspects. Look at all that has happened in between retrospection and looking back.
I suppose this is my cue to wish the happy couple all the best. Love each other and be gentle with each other come what may. Maybe I’m not in the place to give the best advice on marriage but still…anyway, here’s a toast to lifelong happiness in each other’s arms. Germaine Greer once said “A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.” I hope you both remember this while maneuvering through the bends during your journey together.
Another close friend of mine, Phoebe is leaving for
Australia later in the evening. She’s answered that call to move on to a better and more challenging job in a completely different community, bless her. Sometimes I wish I had the guts to just take off to somewhere alien and start afresh like what she is doing. I’ve always had this dream, back when I was younger, to pack up and fly into a distant land – probably New York City or somewhere like that, and wake up in a classy apartment smack in the middle of a glitzy and glittering city. I’d have this totally great job that the rest of the world would kill for…and there’d be lots of wining and dining and romancing and all that. Alas, that dream has gone POOF on me a long time ago. I’ve grown up too soon I suppose and now I have too many obligations to handle that being carefree and impetuous is really, really becoming a thing of the past. S I G H. Anyway, Pheebs, here’s wishing you all the best in everything that you do. Best of luck over there in OZ land…take good care and remember to kidnap some furry baby koalas for me.
Boy, I am feeling rather nostalgic today. I was browsing through Friendster and my mails earlier. It is interesting to see how people I used to know way back when were turning out to be on this day. And rather inspirational at that. I could see from the pictures posted how some of my old friends are now located at different parts of the world, leading completely different lives totally unimaginable back in those days when we were still school-kids in our ghastly light blue uniforms. Some have good careers to boot, traveling the globe and experiencing different cultures and all that. When prompted, I hear of them telling stories of their adventures or misadventures, how they slogged it out to be where they are today. It’s enlightening to keep in touch with all these news about them. It grants me the ability to see life in a bigger picture somehow instead of just being caught in my own bubble.
I’ve a dear old friend who works three jobs simultaneously and at the same time could find a quiet moment to enjoy life’s offerings on Paradise Island, Hawaii (yeah, Peter, I’m talking about you, hehe)…he’s into the food business and tells about how much effort and time it takes to make a single dish for fine dining…one that guests like me at the restaurant would probably gobble up in a minute. Impressive pictures of food he takes, though it comes in pretty small helpings. And the desserts have such intricate designs too. This reminds me somehow that I should take my meals at a slower pace…to taste my food slowly and enjoy every bite in justification of the effort put into their preparation.
The same goes to life. Life is like champagne I suppose; it shouldn’t be wasted by drinking it down in a single gulp. At times, I’ve felt as though I was rushing through life…there was always a list of things to do. Even when there was absolutely nothing to do on a lazy Sunday, the list would still be there at the back of the head, pressuring me somewhat. And I’d be thinking, I haven’t done that. I haven’t achieved that. And at the next possible moment, I’d be rushing through my days again, trying to complete what I’ve listed down to do…to achieve the goals that I’ve set for myself. At certain points it was as though I was going through the motions, ticking those tasks off rather viciously. Done that. Bought that. Presented that. Planned that. Achieved that.
But at the end of the day, do I really understand what is the meaning behind every single task that I’ve carried out? And did I enjoy my journey to achieving my goals? Or am I just lost in that mad rat race to earn, earn, earn more, get, get, get more and compare, compare, compare more, while at the end, there’s lesser to gain and much more to lose?
Sighhh…no wonder there’s a phrase saying that youth is wasted on the young. Oh, what I’d give to be carefree like I was ten years back. I guess I could only be thankful that during the course of this life, there would be moments like these when I’d take some time off and reanalyze my life and those who are close to me at one point or the other along the line of time…the milestones that we have crossed…to be reminded somehow that I should slow down, breathe, and really, really embrace life the way I should before my time on earth is up.
